party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
