so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
