I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Randomize