pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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