My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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