dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
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Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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