I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
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