He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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