We're like a lot better than the average bears
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
They have beer where we have blood.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
