Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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