She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
