dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
