well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
