Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
