Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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