Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize