The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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