I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
