we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
