Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
