I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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