I am in a vortex of obligation.
Duck Duck Cougar?
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
