people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
