the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
