how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize