I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
