We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
