and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize