I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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