Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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