rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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