So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
of course. lets lasso hookers.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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