It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Randomize