3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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