3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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