Fuck appropriateness.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
