i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
