you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
