She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize