You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
