The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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