you're like a bully in the Christmas story
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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