dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.