guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
