Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize