Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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