Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
