sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize