what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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