I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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