At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Quick, to the slutcave!
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.