I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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